'Mommy's boy' debate rages on social media(5)

Root cause

Ng agreed that a "mommy's boy" develops such a personality largely due to role of the parents at home.

"Often, a mother may not have anyone else in her world. She may have an unsatisfactory marriage or have no friends. She may not have a job, or if she has one, she could be unhappy with it. She may also have a bad relationship with her mother-in-law," she said.

"The mother's entire world revolves around her son, who is everything to her. She holds him tightly to protect him, and arranges everything for him. She basically wants to control him, telling him what he can and cannot do. The son, who doesn't rebel, gradually becomes a mommy's boy accustomed to laziness and simply following his mother's instructions.

"He may feel a close relationship with his mother, or merely want to avoid angering her."

Ng said it is also difficult for the son to break away from the environment in which he grew up. This type of relationship becomes especially problematic when the son is married or dating.

"He still brings his mother into his life, which is frowned upon, whereas a daughter doing the same wouldn't be considered a problem because of cultural differences in gender expectations," Ng added. "If a daughter grows up obediently following her mother's guidance, there is a good chance she will also listen to her husband after marriage, which may be a good thing."

On the other hand, Ng said it is rare to hear a man say, "I used to listen to my mom, and now I listen to my wife."

"This is because a mother is less likely to relax her grip to let her son heed his wife's opinion. However, it is more commonplace for mothers to allow their daughters to listen to their husbands," she said.

Ng added that ideally both parents should have an influence on their children. But the father's influence lessens in a family where there is a mommy's boy. This is unhealthy, particularly when the boy needs a role model. Without a father to guide him, a mommy's boy may develop in an unhealthy way, with the mother dominating his life.

"If a man is brought up in such a way from childhood, his marriage is likely to be affected, as he has never escaped his mother's clutches," she said.

"Such people are unlikely to find true happiness."